Week 29... again

Arwen & I are spending a long weekend in Breckenridge. Not only did he want to get some more snowboarding in, but it's also time for Ullr (oo-lur) Fest, Breck's homage to the Norse god of snow. There's a parade down main street in which some people wear little more than viking horns and fur bikinis in 10* weather. It's pretty cool! Here's a web site.

I am actually working today and tomorrow, but I'm not complaining. I've got a beautiful view out the window of snow, pine and aspen trees. This whole working from home thing defintely has big benefits.

Oh so I should mention that contrary to past reports I am merely 29 weeks along not 30. I briefly lost control of the facts when I threw out my '06 calander. So as of this coming Sunday, we still have 10 weeks to go.

In the past few weeks I've noticed that I've gone from feeling completely terrified of birth to feeling ready for it, and even looking forward to it. Just a few more weeks and we get to meet our little peanut live and in person. I've been feeling strong and healthy and prepared. Reading books and taking classes has helped, as have the group midwife visits. I'm reading a really good book on birth right now by Ina Mae Gaskin, a now famous midwife who helped deliver thousands of babies on The Farm, a well known commune in Tennessee.

Even though I've been feeling good and strong, I am noticing - well really *Arwen* has been noticing - that my emotions are running higher again. Often when I open my mouth the "nice filter" that softens what I'm about to say has been removed, so I have been rather blunt lately. Maybe the hormones that prepare you psychologically to feel strong for birth turn you into a lioness all-around. I hope I can find a way to stay soft & sweet with my honey and yet still feel strong for birth.

Arwen has been wonderful lately. He is so protective, not wanting me to drive on the ice, cautioning me to watch my step going up and down stairs. At our birthing classes, he has been conscientiously taking notes and making lists. The Bradley classes are doing a good job of explaining all that he can do to help throughout the birthing process - and I know I will need him every step of the way. Things like what to feed me at what stages of labor, how to time my contractions, when to drive me to the hospital, and my personal favorite: how to rub my back!

The baby is kicking a lot more. She is amazingly strong. She also seems to have a personality already. When we try to feel around to locate her head or hands or feet, she usually moves away from us, as if to express her independence. Even still, Arwen distinctly felt her head and her hand a couple days ago. (He was pretty impressed with himself, and so was I!) Last night was the first time she kicked so much and so hard that I found it difficult to fall asleep. Her strong kicks have a strangely calming effect on me. I don't feel worried anymore about something going wrong. She seems so determined to be here in the big bright world.